What’s the conversation you’ve been putting off? The one that feels easier to avoid – even though the problem isn’t going away.
Watch the video or read the transcript below to see how a needs lens can help.
💭 Introduction: Avoiding tricky conversations can feel like the easy option—but it often means avoiding meeting important needs, both for yourself and for others.
💭 Main Tip: When you avoid a difficult conversation, it’s usually because you're trying to meet a need—perhaps for ease, safety, or harmony. But avoidance can leave other needs unmet, both for you and the other person.
💭 Example: Imagine you're avoiding telling a colleague that their last-minute changes are affecting your work. Your need for safety or connection might feel met by staying silent, but your need for ease remains unmet as the situation continues. The key is to find a way of speaking that helps keep the relationship safe and connected. You might say, “I really want to be flexible, and I also need a bit more notice to do my best work. Can we find a way to make that happen?”
💭 Over to You: This week, if you find yourself avoiding a conversation, pause and ask: “What need am I meeting by not having this conversation—and what need is going unmet?”
💭 Closing: Facing conflict can feel uncomfortable, but it’s often the path to deeper understanding. Let me know how this lands for you.
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